In Reference

To love's letters.

Sadly enough, like many good things my relationship with Hooper Brown has come to an end. Yes, I loved him with every bone in my body; I sacrificed, and worked on our relationship to the point of tears. In the end it was useless.
I gave up, I really did.
I am sorry I didn’t keep my promise that I would do anything to keep us together. I tried really hard and anyone who knew me while I was dating Hooper would know that I really did love and care about him. I lost so many things in the time of our relationship, but it would be a lie to say it wasn’t worth it. Since Hooper and I have split up I have changed dramatically and I am glad that we were separated. If I was with him as of right now, he would not recognize me. Everyone changes, and I let it happen, I let myself become the person I am now. Who ever that is.
I still miss the way we were sometimes; he is one of a kind. It brings me to tears, tears that I have to hide; that we are not a we at all anymore.

I didn’t even treat him right after I ended things, that is something I regret. I figured if I just treated him the way he treated me in our relationship (and he didn’t treat me like that all of the time) that I would be able to not only receive closure, but scare myself away from running back to him.
Everyone has their weaknesses, and the way I felt for him will always be one of mine.

To never be forgotten.
Goodbye.

Amber Dawn

Intermission

To whom ever it may intrigue,

I will not pretend to know everything that is going to happen in the future, I do not even know half of the things that are happening now. This summer has been life changing, it has brought me to my knees and has had me crawling, begging for a simple fix.
I realize that this experience is a quality of this life, whether or not we signed up for the life we have now in the beginning, this is what we are given to live.
We all change; we have a constant choice, a constant battle within ourselves. It is these battles, these wars with life that makes us who we are. By we I mean you, me, brothers and sisters, mothers and fathers, strangers and neighbors, we are all connected in this.
Now choices we make are often influenced by those we surround ourselves with, but amazingly I am so easily influenced I could write a book on passing a stranger on the street. Surely it wouldn’t be a good read, but anything is possible.
I could go on about how people influence life, but in reality it is yourself that influences your own life. If that makes any sense at all, you realize that it is your choice deep down who you let into your life, who you trust, and who you let affect you.
Not only who, but what… events, objects, words, poetry, the news, actions, expressions, etc..
…everything in this world, and even out of it can inspire you, influence, and change you, but only if you let it.

Now I know this was a letter of rambling and that no one is likely to read it, but if you do just let me know, raise your hand and message me, comment me.

If anyone ever needs to talk, even to a stranger, please contact me.

Sincerely,

Amber Dawn